Hurry up!……..and wait

Did the title grab you?

When I was a young Marine, I would hear this phrase all of the time-“Hurry up and wait.” It meant that everything always needed done in such a rush, but then we’d wait around for the final result. Hurry up and get this camp set up. Hurry up and get the comm (telephone) ran over to the Command post.

Hurry, hurry, hurry…..then wait.

That phrase has stuck with me for the past 21 years and here I still am, “hurrying and waiting.”

It’s a frustrating concept. In our society we expect everything now. From cell phones to microwave meals, we are more impatient than ever. So what is it that we are all waiting for? Are we waiting for that phone call from someone? Waiting in line and thinking that we should have just skipped human interaction and ordered it off the website? Waiting for that new Netflix show to load? How many of you get impatient when the internet is going slow? I remember when we didn’t even have internet and now I don’t know how we ever didn’t.

Time is a strange concept.

For me, I’m waiting on something that appears to be elusive. I am not the first person to wait on this, but it sure feels like I am. I’ve been waiting for about 7 months now. Checking my email constantly. Praying daily (sometimes hourly) for that communication that lets me know that the next thing I need to happen is happening (I know, very vague). I am so impatient that I have become a slave to time. My every emotion hinges on an email or phone call. I try to find things to occupy my time and take my mind off of it, but nothing seems to help.

I am letting someone else control my emotions.

Does that also sound familiar?

Impatience has forced me to lose all composure. It makes me feel weak and I hate feeling weak. Waiting on someone else has taken control of me and I have become a mental slave to it.

So, how do you win a fight with yourself? How can you take back control…..from yourself? I’ve read all of the self-help books that talk about “de-cluttering your mind” and “relaxing.” I’ve even tried meditating. Nothing seems to work. At least, not for long.

The truth is that only time can make impatience get better.

You can read all the books that you want. You can listen to meditation books, music, or nature’s sounds, but in the end it is time that will make it all better. You have to find a way to numb the anxiety and pain that waiting can bring. Sometimes you have to trust that everything happens when it’s supposed to happen. This is one of the toughest things to accept in life.

Worrying won’t add a day onto your life, but the stress of it will sure take days off of it.

I’ve found that anything other than just sitting around is the key to beating anxiety. That side of yourself that wants you to sit around and worry will also try to keep you from getting off your couch, but this is essential in beating it.

Go for a walk. Head to the gym and get your sweat on. Watch a movie that is mind numbing (comedies work best). Do anything, but sit around and stew about what it is you want and why it’s not happening, yet.

Yes, it’s tough. You may have to literally drag yourself out of your house to do it or the “other you” will keep your mindset in that dark, hopeless hole that is anxiety.

Ok, that’s enough for now. I just checked my email and still nothing.

I’m going to go workout…

One thought on “Hurry up!……..and wait”

  1. You inspire me brother! My flesh and blood. I am so engulfed in your words. They speak things I don’t know how to yet. I’m getting there. It all hits home with me. Keep doing this. Dont ever stop. Your great at this. My desire is to follow in your footsteps with my story too. I love you!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s